Lord knows I've always wanted to fingerblast myself with a pint or two of Rust-Oleum Deck Restore.

It's all fun and games until you accidentally gnaw your fingernails off while eating Cheetos.

I didn't go.

Mr. Hot Techie became Mr. Cloggie Guy over three years ago, so I guess I'm way ahead of the trend. Here's my secret to landing a "hot techie". Be an interesting human being and take an interest in him as a human being. Sssshhhh! Don't tell anyone!

"UUUGGGGGGHHHHH, for shit's sake. No good deed goes unpunished, AMIRITE??"

I love Chubbies!!! Definitely getting a pair of their swimming pairs for over the summer. Then a few more for just chillin.

The way those shorts are being marketed is for some reason totally crazy to me. Imagining some Southern good ol' boys sitting around talking about their new "Ishmaels" is so wonderfully odd and absurd.

Truth. I'm in LA too, where all the Breaux seem to have them in lilac and lemon yellow for LSU game days. And I love chubbies! My cousin rocks this pair, but he's so short he has to have them hemmed so that they are *actually* short, bless his heart.

We have a friend who became a fifth grade teacher a couple years ago, and he's been dealing with a lot of that ridiculousness. He loves kids, he's passionate about education, kids love him; primary education is the perfect choice for him! He tries not to be affected by the weirdness he gets, but it can be tough. I…

There is a HUGE shortage of men in the primary school teaching profession. You normally don't even see a male face in education until you hit High School, which is the stage where society is apparently more comfortable with having them show up.

Of course, from there the pattern becomes a shift to male *dominance* at…

Ugh, I had an elementary school teacher who would VIGOROUSLY scratch his balls, leaving very obvious chalkdust all over the front of his pants.

I had a similar experience with a cousin who decided to paint our bathroom with his poop. It was...reeky.

So...what you're saying is I should stay in this summer.

it is so, so hard to feel bad for people who get to watch HBO for free, while I choose to pay $10 a month to the WORST COMPANY IN THE WORLD AKA COMCAST because having HBO on my television (or On Demand) is actually worth it. But I guess if they don't have a television and/or/because Comcast makes you want to punch…

Maybe she is crazy!

The Louisiana version is called a "Breaux." He owns lots of lilac and pastel yellow clothes to wear on LSU game days. He cries when LSU loses. He cries when LSU wins. He aspires to be Drew Brees. He will definitely become a lawyer.

Jezebel Editor Lady-bro-

southern frat bro is off...his dress is actually identical to mid-atlantic frat bro (well done on that one) and the hair is exactly like the picture above. i.am.so.tired.of.this.hair. it seems to be at its most popular in alabama.

"The Southern Frat Bro" In New Orleans, some of us often refer to these guys as "Krewe of Chad." They generally go out parading in groups.