I remember the day Earnhardt died. I was 17 or so and replacing the rear shocks in my first car, a ‘75 Nova. Like a pro, I had both tires off at the same time and the rear end was up on two bumper jacks. Dad was helping, he placed a bottle jack under the passenger door for extra safety. Our neighbor walks over and…

WE WERE ON A BREAK

This. If you’re married, cheat with other married people.

Get Keith Olbermann to play Junior Bruce and Donald Trump to play Mister President and I’m in.

A dog will literally walk for miles just to get some strange, even if he has a partner at home.

Stallone as a horribly scarred Machine Gun Joe! Please!

Yes. For those of you who thought Canada was perfect in every way, this should really knock you off your unicorn.

Not all opinions matter. I wouldn’t give two seconds worth of thought to something said by a crazy person on the subway and you shouldn’t give one page of text to these willfully ignorant people.

Meanwhile at Metallica

Where are all those daddies who swore an oath to defend the constitution?

Will the documentary be covering fans similar to the ones in the comments here, posting essay-length rants on all the reasons girl Ghostbusters are, like, totally gross man? Because I would actually been interested in seeing if the way I’m picturing them as real people will match up to reality. I suspect it will, but…

i look forward to future spy movies where they discover the disc they were looking for was on the person’s watch face the whole time.

I still think an Alien vs Predator with no humans, or any english dialogue (or subtitles), would be a fun idea. The audience gets to pick a side, like a sports match.

i mean they’ve been talking around it all campaign season but saying the word “abortion” out loud makes for one hell of a soundbite and is all people will hear

Another curious point is that the republicans haven’t really talked about it either.

Yeah, this is actually something that nobody is talking about but should be.

My fool-proof plan to defeat ISIS

Amen to that. Modern MTG features some amazing artwork, but 9 times out of 10, you can’t tell what the subject of the painting is.

Man, I wish I had held onto one of my Alpha Lotuses. They were only worth $400 when I quit and sold my collection. At least they paid for my first car.