Next year Hannity has a cabinet post (senior adviser, minimum). 

Way sweeter than a hydrangea. 

He absolutely did.

“It doesn’t matter what happens to others as long as I get mine.”

The entire country needs to read this. 

The use of “fucker” when referring someone sadly seems to have faded quite a bit over the years. Nice to see I’m not the only one.

He was half of the Flying Kaczynskis tag team in the late ‘70s.

Excellent. 

No. Adult men don’t cry from physical pain. 

Alanis has no idea. She’s only paid to paraphrase shit taken from a similar article on a different site. 

There’s bone dust in my throat and everything is dead, but it’s all right.

You only live once. 

Ruthless. 

“Rookie”?

Fuck. Was gonna say John Spencer Booze Explosion. 

Funny how that happened. 

Funny how that happened. 

Was going to say that. I have the AR-15 version and found it was a great mousepad years ago.  

Was going to say that. I have the AR-15 version and found it was a great mousepad years ago.  

Very well done. 

Garbage, even. 

As you can clearly see from the author’s photo, he has a lifetime of sports participation under his belt. Don’t question his ability to get in-depth about physical contact sports. He certainly didn’t see this topic posted elsewhere over and over and simply create a similar post for Deadspin.