Sorry.

SPF30 is some melanin haver shit. Us true day walkers require SPF50+

OR JUST BE PALE THATS OKAY TOO JOIN OUR COVEN IN THE SHADE WITH THE SPF30

I’ve met people like that. There’s no way to shut them up. If you only ate small amounts of diet food, they still snark about how you must not be exercising enough or ask if you’re eating junk food when no one’s around.

If the only tool you have is a hammer, every problem starts looking like a secret Muslim infiltrator trying to overthrow the government through a covert application of Sharia law

This man is smart. This is a very smart man who is very good at thinking.

I’m shocked by the author positing that they are unflattering on EVERYONE, because as a heavier gal who doesn’t love most dresses on her body, I love all 3 of the maxis that I have purchased. I’m sure you look just marvelous! Plus, what’s more comfortable than sitting like a dude and not worrying about showing your…

Satire can be hard. The problem is good satire tends to have some sort of nod and wink at the audience and this is missing that, so it comes off as mean.

Honestly I was really shocked by how hateful this article was, and I want to be here to support you. I love maxi dresses as well and will continue to defiantly wear them! Commence the spamming of gorgeous max dresses:

Just wanted to chime in and say I have lymphedema. It’s a mild to moderate case, I guess, and mainly affects my foot/ ankle area. I’ll never forget the day I was brave enough to wear capris and sandals to work and some asshole coworker said, in front of everyone, “OMG what’s wrong with your FOOT?”

People with good legs will never understand. Not everyone can just stick on a knee length dress and go. Summer dressing is a pain in the arse and we should be allowed to wear anything that feels good.

Don’t cry!! Just because the author doesn’t like them does not mean that you shouldn’t like or wear them! I think they are very cute and comfortable.

Speaking as somebody who doesn’t wear maxi dresses myself, I love to see other people wearing them and I think they almost always look gorgeous. (Admittedly, I’m getting a little tired of seeing so much of the striped-jersey-knit-with-skinny-shoulder-straps ones, but that’s an argument for wearing EVEN MORE AND VARIED…

I have long maintained that Jezebel is not a “feminist” site. It’s simply pink Gawker.

Right? I have, um, “thigh issues” and I live in a very, very warm and muggy place. I cannot wear shorts. I cannot wear rompers. Maxi dresses save my ass when it’s so hot wearing jeans would result in my melting in an actual puddle on the pavement. Whenever I find a maxi dress I can actually wear with a bra I buy one…

proudly rocking a maxi skirt right now. they’re the shit.

I am too short for maxis but I have the same leg issue hon. I understand all too well.

Ditto. Enormous thighs, tiny waist...maxi dresses are an ideal piece of clothing. I’m wearing a 3/4 length sleeved one right now.

I’ve got me some leg lipidema too (boo, genetics, boo) and with some bad dermatitis and PALE added in, I’m not thrilled about having my legs out. And shorts/skirts also mean I can’t wear my stupid compression socks that keep my legs from being WORSE than they already are, so maxi dresses it is. And I appreciate that…

Maxi dresses, or as we called them through history, dresses.