Good for you, Barry. I have always been a fan and this has just increased my fandom. We are all flawed and have all messed and/or been shitheads at some point. What shows maturity and integrity is the ability to own up to it, apologize, and try to be a better person moving forward.

Emma, I for one will miss you!

How do you not have 10,000 stars??

This happened to me last year when my husband and I were scheduled to go to the Netherlands. Dumbest rule ever.

I love that you drink a Big Gulp of diet Coke on the treadmill. I have a can of DC as soon as I wake up, drink one while working out, and usually end having had three before 7.00 a.m.

Don’t do Five Hour Energy on an empty stomach. I did that once and was nauseated for five straight hours.

My secret hangover fix is my migraine medicine. I tried it years ago after I woke up with an epic hangover that no amount of OTC anything and no prescription painkillers could touch. Amerge and Relpax are godsends.  

Morgan Freeman. It would be priceless.

I would love to hear this list read aloud by Morgan Freeman.

This list, if narrated by Morgan Freeman, would be (even more) hilarious.

I am so tired of Papa John and Peyton Manning (how much more money does he need?). I have never eaten that pizza, and never will. My question is whether the beer sponsors have experienced similar declines in sales. My guess is that they have not. Papa John needs to shut his pie hole.

I am with you, Birdman Birdman. I was just thinking, while reading comments posted on Adequate Man two minutes ago, what a Jackass-sophomoric-fifteeen-year-old-boy since of humor I have (I am neither a boy nor fifteen, although I may qualify for jackass and sophomoric) when I saw this and rewatched it several times.…

I have nothing more profound to say than that this is one hilarious piece of writing. Thank you for making me laugh.

What a dirt bag. That is pathetic.

Way to stay classy, Kate.