Yes. But I’m virtually certain Maple Water is marketed toward dumb hipsters, too, and no extra work has to be put into making it.

Sure and then two years later when there’s a write-up in Everyday with Rachel Ray and and a Target Archer Farms brand version in juice box size they can sell a fuckload of it to your wife and mom

Drop a stalk of asparagus in there and we’ve got gold baby! Gold!

You need to insert 'artisan' before the phrase and you automatically get 200% markup. 300 if you sell it with a handlebar moustache.

Same idea. It’s tasteless and you store it in the basement.

“Hey why’s the E Train running on schedu- GODDAMIT IT’S DARIUS AGAIN!”

Only marginally better than the time Anakin Skywalker opened a Montessori school.

If he’d poked his girlfriend in the eye it wouldn’t even draw a flag.

I hope the ref gets suspended for botching the ejection!

It’s different in that it’s a thousand times worse than a punch

I’m a Colts fan, so I’ll put my bias upfront. Talib should be suspended. I hope I’d feel the same way if this was Vontae Davis eye gouging Owen Daniels.

Stole a page from the Rick Flair playbook.

I’m a Broncos fan, and I hope he gets a game suspension.

How is this not worth an ejection?

#blackcoffeematters

I love you

I bet you disarmed him with your smile.

also those “tattoo” chokers and a chain wallet.

Just going to preemptively give myself some frosted tips tonight, and get ahead of this trend.

Thank god for Sealab, BoyHeathen and I refer to them all as Grizzlebees and routinely make jokes about honeymustardranchchipotle dipping sauce.