“Now if you’ll excuse me I have some important business to attend to.”

The delivery of your comment is funny. The truth in it is sad.

Or anywhere else, for that matter!

The Baseball Furies should have beaten him senseless.  

Two and a half damn seasons too long longer!

Whatever you think of his take, you have to acknowledge that Bill Simmons’s history definitely gives him a position to criticize a person for trying to lure talent away from another organization to join his own.

Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

You buy a hat like that, you should get a free bowl of soup.

You want to make $14 the hard way? 

i almost got head from amelia earhart!

+500 acres of land next to the Great Wall, on the good side.

That’s exactly what I took away from that kid’s quote

I worked for the Wisconsin GOP out of college. I was taken aside and told if I wanted to advance I needed to break up with my girlfriend (Asian) and get a new,  white one. I eventually left, didn’t take their advice and have been married for over a decade to that GF I was supposed to kick to the curb. That’s Wisconsin.

1. First time I agree with Kim Kardashian, it’s true I see my friends who are my age and they have laugh lines and wrinkles, I however do not.

That’s good enough for the “Lone Star State..."

I’m gonna get so drunk so I black out (basically, Brett Kavanaugh-level drunk) and when I come to the next morning I’ll get to experience the joy of the news a second time!

Just like Vietnam, president bone spurs isn’t about to let himself or his family get hurt but is more than willing to use the NFL as a way to talk how “soft” America has become.  As long as they send “the blacks” and poor people into danger Cheetolini is all for it.

Media were amazed by the team’s work ethic. In the true spirit of Qatar, they’d slave away until they got it right. 

“The key to our victory was our decision to Qatar losses.”

For me he will always be Kelly Leak.