A blender?

Steampunk dorks are so hard right now.

Boring to you, not to me (I mean sometimes it is, but real sport isn’t scripted so it’ll inevitably be boring at times). You’re on Jalopnik not fucking Kotaku.

It’s NOT eSports. We don’t give a fuck about RC racing, battle bots, Pinewood Derby, drone races, the Tour De France, or any of that. I’m into motor racing.

I agree with the Boomer. Virtual racing sucks. The marble races is where it's at.

Any public company that attempts to keep cash around “for a rainy day” gets punished by investors. “Put that capital to work!” is the cry. Having cash-on-hand is seen as “poorly managed”.

Next up: Carbon fiber Ming vase. Stupid Ming Dynasty making things out of the wrong materials. 

Except it can be super off. I keep a spreadsheet which accounts for it along with estimated driveline losses. 

Harley-Boomer absolute unit jokes aside, calculating power-to-weight ratios without drivers/riders is a major pet peeve of mine. In lightweight cars, and bikes in general, it’s a big portion of the total mass.

That's so not his real name and so his synthwave handle, like Com Truise, Michael Cassette, or Mitch Murder. 

KARR?

Is that the new ad from the Atlanta Chamber of Commerce?

Indeed, this is a slippery slope. It’s only a matter of a few years before these racers will be using the money from a bank heist to fight alien dinosaurs in space from the seat of a heavily modified Chevelle brought there by a time traveling Harrier Jump Jet. The sanctity of the whole family will be at stake. We…

Those kinds of people like to actually make money. 

Indeed. Get outta here with your Pluto nostalgia, boomers. 

Forget the 0.189 Cd. That makes other cars with low Cds look better than they are. The CdA of this thing was 0.28 SqM, which is the REAL number that matters, and shits all over Teslas, et. al.

These Karenmobiles all look the same. That's the point.

Hold up. I’m generally pro (responsible) firearm ownership, and I lived in one of the more lenient states, Arizona (been on Class 3 machine gun shoots), but where in the holyfuck can you legally own and open carry a rocket launcher? Is this The Onion or something?

I disagree, not apples-to-apples. Value propositions have gone opposite directions in those two respective markets, dollar-for-dollar.

That’s why I own a boring shitbox and spend my money on guitars. The modern car market basically says, “You want something interesting but aren’t a high earner, well, fuuuuuuuuuuck you.”