Dana Carvey bit.

Is a podcast.

Real question: would Trump being thoroughly stoned make him better or worse?

We're only halfway. Let's not jinx it.

Subtle commentary? Probably not.

There are no right answers, only horrible mistakes.

Back, you demon! Back, I say!

I think I'm allergic to that first one.

There aren't standards regarding formality in the White House anymore, but a fist bump does not convey how large Trump's penis (definitely, truly, bigly) is.

Um, it sounds like you've become middle school cuttles. Are you also playing Neverwinter Nights and eating Ho-Hos?

[obligatory Jurassic Park quote]

Oh thank god. 'Cuz I'm running real low on love, but my spite is endlessly replenished.

Is the third thing looove?

Anybody else not watching Iron Fist because they're finding Danny's hair distracting? There are other reasons not to watch, of course, but that's up there for me.

Can confirm that this works on smartphone. Smartphones even seem not to have the "mixed-up comment sections" issue.

Depends. Did you gaze into his eyes?

Priorities!

She may just have a different audience. One that needs the exposition.

Have fun with The Simpsons!

Trump would also like to go back to the election campaign, because hey, why not? That's how this works, right?