2014 hot take: "Sherman should stop his thuggish behavior!"

I'm just saying, it'd make a better halftime show. That's all.

Look, I know you only had 30 seconds, but I really feel as though you didn't spend enough time establishing a believable narrative.

I didn't really care who wins on Sunday, but now I don't think I've ever wanted anything more than for Lynch to score 6 touchdowns, grab his crotch after every one, win the MVP, receive the trophy from Goodell and get interviewed on the podium after. IF THERE'S A JUST GOD THIS WILL HAPPEN.

but what does that make the reporters who insist on continuing to ask him questions despite knowing well ahead of time that Lynch has no intention of answering any of them?

Finally, there's a SILENT killer of children. Usually it's such a noisy process...

They should make them do things that people have to do on other reality shows. I'd totally watch Peyton Manning eat a plate full of bugs while Calvin Johnson cooks bread pudding and JJ Watt tires to prove he's smarter than a 5th grader.

I liked Drew's idea a while back... have the game scored via fantasy points instead of regular points. See how it affects play calling, strategy, etc. since the score is meaningless anyway, and I'll bet just for the novelty of it it'd be the highest rated pro bowl ever.

clearly, Bush should have considered raping some kids in an effort to reduce USC's punishment.

Hot water bath FTW. I use my defrosting bowl more than dang near anything in my kitchen.

In this hypothetical situation, he would totally try to check in the game for his quarterback.

Most perplexingly, Concha mentions the Greek columns present on Obama's victory stage on election night 2008, which I genuinely did not realize anyone had a problem with.

I can see it but I doubt Chicago would give him both jobs.

FANCY