I wanted to post this in response to another commenter, but I cannot find her. Please Jezebel write about / post this somewhere! ❤️

s/o to Mikhail Kornienko, too, who gets to a return to a country run by a power hungry toddler that the US can’t piss off too much because we need their rockets to get to space

I love Chris and Mark Kelly. So glad we have two!

Bullshit.

Your mother wouldn’t let you leave the dinner table until everyone had finished. The etiquitte standards should actually be higher in a “fine dining” establishment.

I’m guessing you like a lot of caramel in your frappuccino.

This seems to be a concept you are unable to grasp, but the definition of politeness is not “always behaving in the way PrettyPrettyBunniPrincess prefers.” In fact, many people would consider insisting that anyone who doesn’t ignore what anyone else wants and only behaves according to your standards is being rude by…

“...they are all four small-batch artisanal, and reclaimed.”

Josh Duggar is not welcome at my birthday party.

This is crazy exciting. As a female student in the UK from a low income background, Oxford (and Cambridge) still felt pretty inaccessible and kind of unwelcoming to me. I don’t go to Oxford (and love the university I do attend) but it would be really awesome to think of other women like me who might get more of an…

*your

I do think there are a lot of secret nos who aren’t discussing it with anyone because they know they’re wrong, hopefully it won’t get as close as the divorce referendum results.

That’s a rooster and he’s dancing like that because that’s their mating dance. He may be standing there watching to make sure the kiddo isn't hurting the hen because roosters are strange little creepers.

I hope he's alright. He doesn't deserve this. As for the bullfighter, fuck that guy.

Am I supposed to feel bad for some Neanderthal fuck who was injured when his job was to kill the bull? This makes me nearly as happy as a story about drunk redneck fucks who have hunting accidents.

Guy deserved it. This barbaric “sport” is animal cruelty near its worst and should be banned.

So my parents bought their retirement home from a wealthy, childless gay couple. Y’all, this spot is wall-to-wall party showers. We’re talking minimum 25 square feet in the smallest one with 3 shower heads, and the master bedroom with, no fucking shit, 12 heads total and enough room to comfortably fit at least 10-15…

It has to be. There’s no way this can be AT ALL serious. Blair looks like a cranky flight attendant on a forced long-haul, Travolta looks like he’s trying to cover an incipient nervous breakdown, and Schwimmer looks painfully constipated (tho maybe the coffee will help?).

I’m going to go ahead and call this The Best Comedy Of The Year, because that photo alonnnnne is ahhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha ha OMFG LOLOLOL.