What a game changer. Here I thought Christians couldn't get abortions, but it turns out they're they only ones that can! God, you do have a funny sense of humor!

Living vicariously through your child's "beauty" and "talent", until such a point in time where they internalize this distorted vision of self-worth and continue to pageant, even though they have become a threat to you and you no longer wish them to compete. But because karma has a sick and twisted sense of humor,…

I just watched the trailer with the sound off, and it seems to me that this is a show about mud, yes? Sliding on it, driving various vehicles on it, rolling around in it, drinking in it, sexing in it, fighting in it, tubing on it?

WTF, IS THAT FRED ROGERS?!

Ummmmmmmmmmmmm Ghostbusters?

WTF are you doing manufacturing everything in Kansas? Any good capitalist knows that land and labor are in the same ledger column: cost. And both of these yield a higher profit margin outside the good ole US of A with it's bullshit commie laws mandating a minimum wage for its unskilled idiot labor pool living high on…

I'm squarely in the "more (factual, relevant) information leads to better decisions" camp.

:( Can I entice you with some teasers? Does Lauren Graham love Raymond, just like everyone else? Will Mae Whitman's persistent dedication to emotionally unavailable men finally land the greatest love of all?

Same boat here. I find it so moving because it's the only show I can think of that isn't profoundly cynical. There's no villains, just complicated, sensitive creatures who sometimes fuck up and hurt one another.

Ah yes, another arena where men see an open seat next to me and think, "score, 1.5 seats!"

Please send an anonymous tip to Jezebel with the names of these "doctors".

Glad to know I'm not the only one who cries during every.single.episode of parenthood.

You win the internets today. congrats!

boom. nailed it.

Autotune vomit?! This shit is 10x more creative than the original.

I've said something kind of similar and gotten the same shit you're getting, which is unfortunate because all this shouting precludes having a conversation that might actually be worth having. Maybe not, but we'll never know.

Here are the only two problems with this story:

Is it just me or did Malia suddenly and strikingly become the spitting image of Michelle?

I feel badly for your son. He has a mother who clearly thinks he's incapable of making decisions (as he just blindly obeys the rules of his wife), is in no way responsible for the rearing of his daughter (whose bad behavior at lunch is clearly the result of bad mothering), and a wife who (if we are to assume the…

You are right, your bitch aunt doesn't deserve a gift. Since this is a passive aggressive thread, the gift donation is a good idea (I'd take it even further and just forge the certificate, since the problem here is really a lack of means on your end). You could be direct though: I know you were disappointed in the…