Then I was told my tip (15%) was too small.

You remember that Sunday morning, two months after dad left, you wake up and notice mom’s hair is seriously mussed, and then you walk into the kitchen and dad is making eggs like the past eight weeks never happened . . .

No, I really hate their fans. 

One of the thoughts that I’ve hated more than anything over the last 300 million years it feels like Trump has been President, is the amount of credit he gets for being some next level supervillain genius who’s masterfully manipulating the press and his believers.

“The source, who was unnamed but reported to have an 11 inch penis...”

Perfect metaphor for America right now. Nobody but a fucking asshole wants the president we have, and nobody but a fucking asshole wants to see this team in another Super Bowl. Just one more thing to endure.

CAN WE PLEASE STOP WITH THE PUPPY CANCER TALK YOU GUYS

Yeah, this is right on. I think many gay people like myself don’t really give much of a shit either way if Kevin Hart hosts the Oscars, nor are we really much interested in an apology. Most of us get that comedy is not real life (no matter how offensive - or worse, unfunny - it is). But it’s infuriating that Hart is…

• FELL OFF TOILET, FELL ONTO A MOUSE TRAP, TRAP CLOSED ON PENIS

SMASHED PENIS IN BETWEEN TWO WHEELBARROWS

“HAD AN EGG VIBRATOR COME APART IN VAGINA LEAVING PART OF IT AND5 BATTERIES IN THE VAGINAL CANAL”

“SLIPPED & FELL ON WET FLOOR AT HOME & ALSO HAS HAD SEX TOY STUCK IN VAGINA FOR 8 MONTHS”

Addiction is such a terrible demon to battle. Mental health issues, the same. To hell with the football games, I hope that Josh gets his life and his mental health straightened out soon. I feel for him.

“Currently NOT dead” sure sounds like something a guy who HAD BEEN dead would say...

I know it’s been hard, but I’m glad Drew is in New York, where he can be close to his large adult son.

Thank goodness. This means I can stop calling up random Williams-Sonoma employees and yelling at them. 

It’s dangling elusive carrots in front of talent, to use their talent with no intention of anything other than using their talent. Then to phrase it as “You don’t have to do anything.” but then all of the hiring asks about audience and previous work. They’ve created a system that steals labor based on hopes. It’s…

But don’t write if you don’t want to write or if you suspect it is a route to getting a contract from us. It is not.

You say that....But I used my phone’s hotspot feature to allow me to use my laptop in the bathroom, so I could avoid holding my phone while shitting. Is that NOT innovative interneting? Sure, it ended up halfway in a urinal, and don’t even get me started on how bad hand dryers are for your keyboard, but the point…

I write a semi-regular fanpost series on the SBNation boxing blog, BadLeftHook, tracking bad boxing judges. I don’t expect to be compensated, because it’s a fanpost; there’s no advertising, and it’s not on the main blogroll. It’s just something to engage with the community there, and to work out my frustration at all…