I also kind of enjoyed the first two FF flicks… up until the point that they made Galactus, one of coolest Marvel characters ever, into a killer cosmic fart cloud.

It's like comic book movie makers think in medias res means something dirty

It had some neat ideas and JEH was a good choice for Freddy, but man the execution was terrible. I'm inclined to lay blame at the feet of Samuel Bayer, who before was best known for Green Day and Blink-182 videos.

Jeezus, every frame of Fant-4-Stic would have to assault your retinas with pure awfulness to best Catwoman.

Haven't they figured out now that origin stories are a bore? I mean, I'm no comic trivia champ, but I do know who the FF are and what they can do, but I couldn't tell you what their origin story in the comics is other than *something something* radiation *blah blah.* It's really not that important, just tell a story…

*Freddy cues up Enya CD, turns on aromatherapy machine loaded with lavender oil*

Now, if only Jawbreaker could pay it forward and give me a few of those bucks for all the time I've wasted listening to friends with otherwise reasonable taste in music gush about this decidedly mediocre band. I mean, I dig a few of their songs, but I've never been able to put my finger on why they inspire such…

Grill Me Three Times

The power of the Old Gods compels you!

What if it's a chimp luchador, with a mask and besequined unitard?

Alternate title: My Best Motherfuckin' Friend

Reading this, maybe it makes some kind of sense that Alien Lanes is/was/always shall be my favorite GBV album, because every song except 5 of them clock in under two minutes and not a single one breaks 3 minutes. Of those five "Motor Away" is only 6 seconds north of two minutes. Maybe that why it feels like such an…

Yeah, games too. I'm currently slogging my way through Elder Scrolls Online, marveling at the game's scope and ambition while wincing at its many annoying flaws.

I think you'd dig John Carter. It's a cool combination of dense sci-fi lore and the fun, old school ,Saturday-morning-serial vibe that today's dead-serious blockbusters forget.

Yeah, I don't even want to get started on music. I guess I'm fascinated by failure. I love to read about forgotten bands of the '60s and '70s that maybe put out one great single or album but other circumstances doomed them to obscurity. I know that probably sounds like some hipster bullshit, but it really is amazing…

I've always had a peculiar fascination with movies that are ambitious but deeply flawed. I guess I find them more interesting than movies that are out-and-out successes.

I think I've been attacking my backlog all wrong. I've been bogged down in playing the ridiculously long, grindy games in my library like Elder Scrolls Online, Project CARS and The Witcher 3, when I could be marking some of the shorter games off the list.

I'd say that the fifth Leprechaun movie, Leprechaun in the Hood, is the best of the series, but the jury's still out on if it fits this article's "actually quite good" criteria.

I'd also argue for Freddy vs. Jason but throw in Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives as well—I also have a soft spot for Jason X, but I know that it's by no means an "actually quite good" movie.

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