The first thing to do is to stop referring to people who kickstart things as “investors”.

Transplanted Australian? Very odd accent.

Drivers cannot be expected to be prepared to deal with unnatural hazards like, say, birds.

Maybe don’t.

Well, he’s demonstrated the necessary hypocrisy, so that’s a start.

Can we get an administration take on pictures of Iraqi and Syrian kids injured in conventional airstrikes?

Just curious.

Pfff, like anyone can actually have sex for three whole minutes.

There is a weird subculture in the fighting game scene that causes some people to mistake being awesome at a fighting game with being an actual tough guy.

If only we lived is some sort of technologically advanced society where college kids could effortlessly communicate with their families in real time. We could give them some sort of portable or mobile device that they could carry around to facilitate that communication.

That would be awesome.

Is there anything more insufferable than people with “alternative lifestyles” humble bragging about not living 9 to 5?

Nothing saying wild, nonstop FPS fun like slow loading, notoriously inaccurate muskets that are only effective when fired from massed formations while standing still at relatively short range.

The inability of people to not totally lose their shit at the slightest hint of danger always blows my mind. You’d think there was a guy actively shooting at them, the way some of those people are fleeing in blind panic.

Or not actually islamists in this case.

I have a friend who has been a “writer” since high school. We both are in our 50's. He has never submitted a single thing to any kind of publication, nor published so much as a blog post. Still, he persists in describing himself this way.

Cue Old School guys still living the glory of their 1982 State Football Championship complaining about how these wimpy kids just can’t take real coaching anymore in 3... 2... 1...

Dude was driving without insurance or a license, with bald tires, logs for shocks and an open beer. Do you really think mandated inspections were going to have any impact on his behaviour?

Just as well. He probably would have missed the whole announcing season following a devastating injury to every bone in his body.

Any tree tough enough to grow in a desert where dudes wear gutras isn’t having any of your weak-ass 6 inch run at it.

If you’re going to rely on people to go into a menu and turn it off, why bother with the GPS stuff at all?

That’s certainly going to be their opening offer, but only an idiot would make that their only offer. Whatever they ended up paying to get enough volunteers would be a bargain compared to what this bad PR is going to cost them.