I think we all know what’s really happening here.

Hawt taek!

This is still a car blog, right?

Outstanding!

In this episode of “Doug Discovers Animal Husbandry”...

What’s insane is that these cars ever cost 34 grand before incentives. Who in their right mind would pay that for (essentially) a Suzuki hatchback with an electric motor?

Anybody want some ABC gum?

Shit. We already hit peak DeMuro? That wasn’t supposed to happen for another 20 years?!?! THIS IS THE END OF ALL THINGS!!!

What, exactly, does this have to do with sports? Look, I get that you’ve never seen a gun in your life, and I get that the Glorious People’s Republic of Gawker requires a certain number of articles bashing republicans, but please, for the love of God, keep your purely political garbage off the sports website. I need…

They will literally topple the Sears Tower. You will be able to see the explosions from space.

Seriously, look at that bastard of a roof rack. Was that thing the pace car for the Dakar Rally?

It is hilarious that you actually believe that a public transit option could ever work as well as a private system like Uber. Ride the bus or train in Chicago and then get in an Uber and see what a private company has done in 2 years next to almost 100 years of public works projects. Or look at Detroit’s tram to…

Bernoulli’s principle has nothing to do with life on airplane wings. A common misconception. http://www.physicsmyths.org.uk/bernoulli.htm

Adam, have you ever actually been in an Uber car? Only a pure, crack-rock socialist could call this company evil. Especially when stacked up against cab companies, whose “policies” towards employees, injured people, and the public at large makes Uber look Utopian. As someone living in downtown Chicago, Uber has…

GAWKER MEDIA ALERT! We must protect Lord Hillary from any and all attacks! CIRCLE THE WAGONS PEOPLE! This is not a drill!

Nope. That’s just the First Amendment.

Doug,

So, if a company employs someone, anyone, who commits a violent crime against a customer, your argument is that we should boycott said company. Or any company that makes efforts to limit liability. Brilliant. Just a brilliant argument.

I can’t believe I had to come here to post this. You guys are losing your edge.

Also, more pictures please!