So, only the teams that Leitch pays moderate attention to get a write-up dealing with relevant issues. And...you know, get PREVIEWED.

The body of this article contained one (1) occurrence of the phrase "Seattle Mariners" and/or the words contained therein.

When asked for comment about the theft of his letter, former President Nixon was quoted as saying:

Slow news day at Deadspin? Or is this a new feature?

That's unfortunate. He's one of few guys whose frame could hold that much weight and still look ok.

@BassForever: Yep. Graduating in May.

@BassForever: That's the UCF defensive tradition, you know.

Aw, damn. His abs don't look as impressive as they used to, oh well.

@tastes_like_burning: Mandatory amphetamines, too!

Yeah. The Rays deserve a shot to get into the postseason for once. They'll never get there without the help of Selig intervening. Never.

So...the financial backbone of baseball is based on bags of chips? That explains Prince Fielder...

@thewhizzonator: Its really not that bad of an atmosphere inside the dome when its full, either. Its got a certain...je ne sais quoi about it.

Just get on with it!

This is just going to keep going, isn't it?

@Eralc Alegna: Gay men do look, yes. Quite often. Quite carefully.

So, someone was a fan of Lost and desperately wanted to throw in a reference, no matter how ham-handed.

If you thought it was funny when they said "Bidet" once, just wait till they say it 40...

If you thought it was funny when they kissed once, just wait till they do it 40 times!

@BeefFajitas: Jinx!

Pot, meet kettle.