HOW AMAZING WOULD IT BE IF THEY ROASTED HILLARY AND GENERALLY ACTED AS THOUGH SHE WERE THE SITTING PRESIDENT, a la HILLARYBEATTRUMP.ORG

Ah, yes. That post-cunnilingus glow. Saves you a trip to Sephora.

The last time I had Diet Coke and Wild Turkey I lost weight from all the vomiting the next day. The Hangover Diet.

None of this is true. According to Facebook and Fox News, these pipelines are being constructed to fight terrorism, create hundreds of thousands of jobs, and to liberty our freedom. Opposing these pipelines, according to Facebook, means you want to ban recess for kids because pussification participation trophy. …

Yeah, there was no way Trump was going to become President.

That’s the most jelly beans ever in one place at one time. Period.

I went to an all-girls school. I loved it and hope to send my (potential) daughter(s) there one day. I didn’t find that the school encouraged a single way of being a girl— it encouraged all ways. It was like we were living in a bubble in which society’s expectations of girls were muffled. There was no ‘boys like…

But lying about it repeatedly, in person and via surrogate, puts the new president’s priorities and lack of perspective in context. He could have gone high and not addressed it at all, or he could have been petty but accurate and pointed out the enormous crowds he drew during his campaign. (He could even have said…

This all-girls high school alum is grateful for having had the opportunity. It’s not right for everyone but it was right for me.

How nice would it have been to have woken up today with an alternative President instead?

Why I am marching today (See you soon, NYC!):

You keep doing the Lord’s work and we’ll get through these next eight years.

What cabinet position do you think Trump will offer the Chrissy Teigen’s paparazzo?

I wonder why Jon Chait didn’t get that same sense of welcoming from his women friends.

“The cops say most diamonds the size of Kim’s are immediately shipped off to Antwerp’s diamond district in Belgium and then quickly disappear.

Dear Steve Harvey,

it’s totally your motto