It’s true though. When I kept my name the entire town fell into disarray. There were roaming gangs of feral children attacking seniors. The moose organized themselves and turned against us. It was pure chaos. We had to abandon the place.

I mean...I think some people believe so. And they’re WRONG.

You found her. Battleship4Lyf.

So what you’re saying is that we can look forward to American Horror Story: Toupée Shop, starring Donald J. LePetomane Trump.

“Listen, my policy is going to be a YUUUUUUUGE success. Here’s how it works: everyone receives a Trump brand (TM) ham sandwich at Customs. These are the finest, most luxurious ham sandwiches you’ve ever seen, let me tell you. Top of the line ham sandwiches. Fine ham sandwiches (that are probably made in Shyna). Ham…

Fuck him. It’s Asian Fusion for lunch!

Oooh, I feel you! After he left Texas, he worked in the office of the large DC law firm where I worked. I can’t tell the story because it might out me but within days of arriving he established that he was such a greedy, arrogant, shitty human being that I came home from work and told my husband I wanted to punch that…

Came here to say this.

guvlookingforluv

We call it a War on Women precisely because assholes like you think forcing a woman to make a man wear birth control is preferable to giving her control over her own body after private consultation with her doctor.

Of course, he’s a guy who thinks we should protect our country by forcing other countries to wear our…

To be fair, she looks like a tiny person next to her PHONE.

People who shoot dogs should be on some kind of list.

My husband calls them “Y’all-Qaeda.”

Mark are you the only one working today? I propose a toast to you and your awesomeness. *raises glass* *farts* *falls off rock*

Ah, a mere cat.

The kitten is me.

In fairness, Kinja has some mad problems sometimes. But Wonkette is difficult to look at. Such a great website, with such a terrible layout.

Whoppers on 1000 mile journeys!!! Is that part real???!

Well if all goes the way it should, she’ll never have to work for food and lodgings again.