This ... this is not a happy smile.

Whiskey Beach Take me Away!

Balls so big she has to carry them on her chest.

Maryland Sen Barbara Mikulski is retiring after 2016.

T-shirt! T-shirt! I want it on a T-shirt!

Cops HATE Her! Baltimore Prosecutor Holds People Responsible for Killing a Guy With This One Weird Trick.

How can we get her elected to the Mayor’s office/Governor’s office and is she loaning out her cajones to others who need a pair?

It kind of sucks that this is (rightfully) considered “badass” instead of “woman doing her job correctly.”

“To the youth of this city, I will seek justice on your behalf. This is a moment. This is your moment.”

in an ironic turn of events, the police union is now demanding an “independent prosecutor”

“Forgive me please, but that’s what you get when you play with people’s emotions.”

“She was going to be killed by this guy some day, somehow. She didn’t have to die that night.”

My favourite IKEA experience is one in which I wasn’t even there. I was a nesting 30 weeks pregnant crazy person. My husband was going to Calgary for a bachelor party. IKEA is 9 hours away from us. So this was my chance to get the crib and all the adorable nursery stuff I picked out. I sent him with a list. The only…

I don’t know. Did you make sure that one person had a hammer and the other had a pencil behind their ear? Whose fault is it really if you don’t follow all of their instructions properly?

I prefer going to IKEA alone. I prefer all of my shopping to be alone. No dissenting opinions, no losing people, no one demanding your attention. Just run in, get that shitty $3 vase, and run out.

They fail to mention that the end, where you try to get everything you bought into the car to take home, demonstrates once and for all which person in the relationship is better at Tetris. (It’s totally me.)

Not an good writer.

Set yourself on fire, please. Do us all a favor.

Dear Mr. Calvey,