lolllll

If I were Sofia I would eat those fucking embryos on toast like they were fucking caviar.

George is getting upset!

I believe this accurately depicts the cause of his accidents.

I wonder if his PVDSA monies even cover the rate at which he crashes. He can’t be far from breaking even at the very least.

So everyone else is racing at the limit, which is what you want a driver to do. Maldonado says “I go beyond the limit all the time” which is just admitting he has no fucking idea what he’s doing.

The biggest balls in the world are useless if they aren't connected to a functional brain.

“To find the limit, you need to cross the limit,” Maldonado told The Telegraph, as reprinted by Speed. “I think I have the big balls to cross the limit every time.”

Oh, lol, of course, there it is

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) said that, under Lynch, “We are sadly going to see more and more lawlessness, more recklessness, more abuse of power, more executive lawlessness.”

Eh. I think this is just a thing famous people do anymore. “I was a geek, a loner, shy,” etc. etc. to endear themselves to the public. If there had been as many nerds back in my day as those that claim to have been now, I would have had a LOT more friends than I actually did.

Not a bull.

Jet engine in a Semi. Screw your pansy ass V8 shoehorned into a Chevette!

This one comes to mind: http://www.randygrubb.com/jay-lenos-tank…

I once went to a Wendy’s and asked for a coffee and a baked potato with nothing on it. I was picking up my kid, so I was in a hurry. He gave me the coffee, but asked if I wanted chili, sour cream, or butter on my potato. “Nothing, I just want the potato”. This was too jarring for him. He stopped, potato in hand, and…

“We asked for urine samples. We got three feces samples, two saliva, and one severed hand.”

One time I ordered a 4-piece McNuggets and was given a 4-piece McNugget box filled to the brim with tartar sauce.

No, this was in Anaheim, CA. There were many, many places. I just like living on the wild side.

I used to play a game at my local Burger King called, “How will they mess up my order today?” I would order a #1 combo (Whopper, fries, soda), with only ketchup on the whopper.

They never got it right. Not once.

Highlights were the time I got two fries with no drink, two drinks with no fries, a chicken sandwich (do they…