That party sounds fun as hell, I wish I was invited to stuff like that more often - I'D HAVE ACTUALLY SHOWN UP!!

Shit like this won't end until we stop rewarding shock-stupidity-as-entertainment with money.

Sure Bill, let's do that but first let's print out our "Real Sex-Ed in Schools" shirts. I'll expect you to wear one on your next show to show support for your own idea.

I'll read all the historical write-ups you have to give lady. Bang up job, seriously.

Hospital administrators were later quoted as saying, "What the hell are you people pissed about now, she was dead BEFORE she got here!"

But did you dream?

They really should teach a course, there's just too many rules.

That sir, is Bullshit.

You forgot the one about good-looking women not getting tickets at all.

This is how horses give side eye.

Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

"Financial suppository" is my new nickname for...everything.

Thank you for the much needed chuckle!

"You can be proud of a woman, while men can be proud of inventing the modern, democracy, technology. Men are engineering the future."

I'm in the same boat in regards to surpassing my husband, and so far we're still...ok but I do worry about him suddenly deciding he can't deal.

As a woman engineer who engineers the future: kindly STFU.

In high school my sprinting cleats were Pumas, looked pretty sweet too. But agree, I'd never wear them for jogging or other sports.

You can take my canned cranberry sauce from my cold dead fingers!!

Regular candy canes do indeed suck, but have you tried Hershey's chocolate mint ones? Fucking delicious. You're welcome.

"It's changing right in front of my face. I didn't plan this. It's just happening. People keep talking to me, asking me questions, and I can't really answer certain questions because it's still happening, right now. and I'm still goin' through the motions of like, what am I gonna do? You don't just stop loving…