Are you my high school best friend? We're from Tucson and she lives in San Diego. ;) Hope you have a safe trip!

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY???

Aw man, I used this same gif earlier in the pie article, and no one noticed. It's a good gif.

Yes, exactly. This is the internet, so everything I say is completely serious and true.

Jennifer Lawrence.

NO MERLOT NOOOOOO

Why are you here?

That just LOOKS like Hitler painted it. And someone makes that joke every time Bush's paintings are discussed, but you took it to another level, bravo.

Ugh...we're not all gun nuts, I promise. In fact, we weren't really nutty at all until the recession hit. :(

I've been in the grey for over a year. This is partially to do with the fact that I realize if I don't get to an article with something funny within 5 minutes of being posted, I get buried, so I just don't bother. C'est la vie.

I just want somebody to talk tooooooooooo. *cry, sniff*

Rachel Berry was way ahead of the curve on this one.

Well, she's right. It is pretty fucking stupid to advertise female soldiers in makeup. She said nothing on the actual attractiveness of the soldier and spoke instead of how combat-ready she appears.

I had my thyroid out two years ago and happened to read STTM shortly after going onto the thyroid cancer survivor's web page and bawling my eyes out thinking I was gonna gain a hundred pounds and man voice. I've ONLY been on Armour, after a long argument with my endocrinologist that ultimately forced me to switch to a…

I totally gave him an enthusiastic blow job the same night, and he seemed quite appreciative. Ah, we'll see how it goes.

Faze, spread the word! Yeah, I mean, I guess there's not much I can do if he acts weird about it, even after I don't. I guess I just want to know what other people do in these situations.

I hooked last night with a guy with a smaller than average package. I could tell that he's really self-conscious about it. This is...new territory for me. Any trail blazers have any good advice? For what it's worth, he knows what he's doing with his fingers and mouth, and gave me an amazing orgasm, so I'm not worried…

Godspeed You, Black Emperor is my go to "I'm so cool, I'm obscure" band reference. I fear it's too effective. My other one was Neutral Milk Hotel until April ruined it for me.

Can we talk about the fact that they turned The Giver into a movie? Is this a good thing or a bad thing? I loved that book.

Ooooh, I was hoping someone would post this. I <3 Wallace and Grommit (and you).