I can’t see United being less than 4th. They were a pain in the ass to score on last year and have added, Pogba, Mkhitaryan and Ibra. That’s a serious amount of creativity and talent. Add onto that a Europeless schedule. Long term I dunno with Ibra’s age but they don’t look like slouches to me right now.

They just want that sweet legal weed.

I’m pretty sure this is the “White People shit” Leslie Jones was talking about.

Hmm. Maybe. A second punchline of sorts.

I’ve been trying out a Hope Solo joke at open mics recently. It isn’t landing as well as I thought it would. I’m gonna keep trying to make it work though because I like the wordplay a lot.

I will always miss Tuesday night fights.

The CIA got all the pictures of the insides of your houses and jobs that they need and they don’t want to pay for the servers anymore.

Wow. Did not expect to see this pop up here. One of my all time faves.

Peter Jackson has.

Unless make specific college enrollment rules for the minor league.

ROSENBAGGER!

SUFJAN DAY IS THE BEST DAY.

Same happened to Adriano as well.

ahahaha. perfect choice.

Another fun milkshake secret from a former shake maker. A french fry or two in your peanut butter milkshake is the realness.

They left the lights on at Stade de France last night and they are currently infested with moths 20 mins before kickoff. They are vacuuming moths ahahaha.

Jesus Christ that’s terrifying.

I’m pretty sure my life’s goal is to make it on this list. MUST AQUIRE FAME. MUST ACHIEVE TRUE WOKENESS.