It works for “artistic” fields like Graphic Designer. You should see their resumes: they fold into weird shapes, have wild colors, QR codes for URLs, it’s nuts, but that field is like that.

It’s not grumpy, and I’m not HR, I’m IT management, worked up from Desktop Technician, through a couple of analyst and network engineer positions, and have been managing for years now. I know what I’m talking about, and people in my position do not have the time or the desire to read non-standard “jazzed-up” resumes.…

If I’m hiring, and a resume which refers to the anything as “the upstart David to the Goliath” of anything crosses my desk, that’s as far as I’m skimming, and the resume is getting round-filed.

I don’t think a girl can pork a guy. The “pork” is a penis, which is bad enough, but if you try to map “pork” onto female genitalia it won’t turn out well.

The godless thing not so much, but any insult to the sentient pile of superhuman stupidity that is Albert Burnkeo is spot on. Want to hear the most obvious, regurgitated, non-backed-up-and-then-turned-up-way-past-“liberal caricature” drivel on Gawker? Look for the Burneko “politics” pieces.

While we don’t endorse the specific action Osborn took

Thank you for #1. Came here to say it. There is basically no resemblance between the two.

DO NOT USE LASERS TO PLAY WITH YOUR DOG.

DO NOT USE LASERS TO PLAY WITH YOUR DOG.

No problem. Get a Miss Piggy doll, take a pic of you with it, and no one will know the difference if you walk around saying it’s a pic of you with Amy Schumer.

You are a dumbfuck. Stop using a dude I like for your avatar.

You know the answer to this. It starts with “B” and ends with “ecause he or she’s an asshole.”

That quick shot at the end, of him sadly considering what he’s done, is kind of priceless.

smi1ey, don’t pansy out. You stay the course.

Damn straight. Glad to have you on Team Man. If she doesn’t keep herself up she gets traded in.

Be careful. If it gets them set into permanent sag mode it hurts you too.

You broads really care about dumb shit like this and think it matters, don’t you?

It’s because we’re still pissed about that fucking stamp tax.

Yeah, how dare they?

It’s almost like you’re self-mocking, but I’m guessing you don’t see it that way.

tl;is