If they’re gonna change the logo, they might want to pick a player that hasn’t been credibly accused of sexual assault.

Not sure that any special circumstances need to be arranged to ensure that a child rapist has a miserable time in prison.

Maybe you shouldn’t GUARANTEE how someone you’ve never met feels after experiencing something that you’ve never experienced. 

Yes, because I’m sure the only way he came across that tweet was by typing his name into the search bar.

As a fellow Met fan, I can assure you that whatever you’re referring to is a coping mechanism. It’s a lot cheaper than alcoholism or drug addiction.

This is all fake news, as I’ve been assured by none other than the President of the United States that Soler power goes away at night and on cloudy days.

I’m sorry, but Phil Simms was still great in 1992 when he was 37 and perpetually injured?

Worth noting as well that a lot of sources are saying that the only EPL club that Coutinho will accept a move to is Liverpool.

I’m just confused about how not having to listen to Michael Kay for any length of time fits into this “curse” of which you speak.

“By law, if the President personally congratulates you on Twitter, it means you’re a terrible person.”

Uh, yep. Just take the L and move on.

Piers Morgan is a twat in every possible way, but I’m 95% certain that even he was being facetious with the “declaration of war” comment. Again though, still a colossal twat.

So according to your logic, because bikers are less likely to kill anyone and willingly engaging in a higher risk activity, the ones who blatantly disregard traffic laws should not be included in this discussion?

I’m also calling hard bullshit on your “it’s extremely rare that a cyclist puts anyone in danger” take. I…

This is a Marianne Williamson-level weird-as-shit take.

Out of curiosity, what are the acceptable job titles that qualify someone to run for president?

Ok now I’m confused, because Scott Hartnell doesn’t have a single lovable quality either.

It’s really not.

My first pass at lip reading was “What the fuck did you say to me? What’d you say??”

You seem fun.

I think it’s probably the other way around considering one guy is airing his grievances to the press and the other is dismissing it as no big deal.