What? What about oreos?  Specifically the mint kind.  Have you tried dunking a mint oreo in milk?  It’s as close to crack you can get without having to smoke it....

This is where I draw the line.  #cookiegate

Stars!  Stars for all of you!

Oh, Mitch.  Mitch Mitch Mitch.....I can only hope to God that you know what it’s like to be under literal assault some day....

HamNo you’ve got it all wrong.  We just need more of the clean, clean coal!

Of course this is what they think. Because to think the opposite, that those “NPCs” they’re referring to are actually fully actualized humans, leading bright, vibrant, fulfilled lives, happily engaged in relationships, jobs, hobbies, and life in general makes them feel bad that they are not doing the same, and instead…

MERRICK GARLAND, FUCKBOY.

I played soccer up through college - only ONCE did I wear eye black for a game. Our coach made us wear it in a state championship game and I have never felt like more of a douche bag in my life.  It offered nothing really.  I wore it playing lacrosse and baseball, but never felt so douchey.  You have to be wearing…

Seriously?!  The sox, or any other team for that matter, would do the exact same fucking thing.  Now, if the players then walked out there and started handing out coffees and lunches, I’d be pretty fucking impressed.  I won’t hold my breath though.

Liar. Liar. Pants on motherfucking fire.

Yea...about those term limits on Presidents....I have a feeling those are going away soon.

Whoa dude....that’s some pretty dark shit.

You think that’s bad?? Suzyn Waldman is only 72! She’s got, like, 47 years left of this....

Despite the fact that I already knew this was all a fucking show, I’m still bitterly disappointed. Not surprised. I’m never surprised by the fucking garbage created by this administration and senate. But disappointed.

John Oliver did a great show this week on how absurd Kavanugh’s testimony was. He highlighted that at one point K-Dawg reminisced about how his father would have the family gather ‘round and read old calendars to them. The problem is that, after just a bit of applied reasoning, you realize that those calendars would…

Counterpoint - we actually elected the pile of shit that your shovel is holding.

I believe Dennis Reynolds said it best:

I said this in 2016, 2017 and 2018. I’m sure I’ll continue to say this every year for the foreseeable future.

Man....if I had a nickel for every fist fight I’ve been in over UB40....I mean, glass houses, right???

Or, you could trim them with scissors....god plucking them sounds like torture....

Or, you could trim them with scissors....god plucking them sounds like torture....