Sometimes a firm, clawed paw to the face is the only way to learn that the kitty is done with being petted, thanks.

No. I just assumed that I'm doomed to suffer. I've had a few people recommend different things that might help. I think that I will bring them up with my doctor during my next visit. Thanks.

That's probably for the best. I had to kill my mom after she started drinking Skinny Girl margaritas. I just didn't see any other way to handle that situation.

It depends, but usually rolling on the back is submission for dogs, and defense mode for cats (ever had the shit kicked out of you by a cat on his back? They've got some powerful back legs).

That's what toe socks are for.

I think it's funny that dogs and cats have the exact same body language, but it means the exact opposite thing (wagging tail, rolling on the back, etc). It's like they're doomed to misunderstand each other forever.

Oh my god the dog nosing the kitten was the best thing ever!

I know! That raven would be great at impersonations!

Ah shit, there's the proof right there!

I need someone craftier than me to photoshop an actual raven over her face.

I'm jealous. Pap smears are fucking horrible for me. They hurt, I get massive anxiety during them, and inevitably someone is going to shove a gloved finger up my vag and say "hey hun, do you mind relaxing this muscle right here? I can't get the speculum in." THAT'S BECAUSE MY BODY DOES NOT WANT THE SPECULUM IN…

Mm, butter.

I agree that the precise trigger isn't the reason, but examining the trigger is important. For me, if I read an article where the headline said "unhinged asshole murders girl," I would want to know how they came to that conclusion. Because that's a judgment, not a fact of the case. When we have the trigger…

In some instances the reason for murder is not necessarily trivial and could be indicative of a much larger issue in our society.

Eh, some people like to watch troll battles I guess. I mean, if trolls weren't so damned gratifying to argue with we wouldn't even have the phenomenon of trolling.

Fuck this guy. Fuck his inability to handle rejection and respect the rights of another human being.

I think the gif is in anticipation of the trollfest that's about to go down in the comments section. It's pretty bad on the Gawker version of this article.

Motherfucker, I am COUNTESS von Fingerbang. I'm the one doing the fingerbanging. So please edit your comment to read "if you weren't so busy FINGERBANGING others 24/7 you'd know this." And you're right, but seeing as how I'm very busy, I don't know these things.

NO YOU HAVE TO FIND REAL HAPPINESS DAMNIT. sityoassdown said so.