You got a nice bangin’-broads-couch.

There is no Jake but what we bake.

No. Just no.

Kirk: You left spacedock without a tractor beam?

I somehow managed to masturbate to this photo.

What does a New Mexican know about the Navy, Jude? ;-D

Bevel Lemelisk... he’s the one who designed the Death Star.

I am proud to say that I once had a relationship with an Air Force pilot. Blonde, blue eyes, large mammaries, flight suit...

You just won the adult version of “Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego”.

Why do you need a disclaimer? Own that shit. I don’t think Jalops will judge you for going into a somewhat terrible titty bar.

Was it Gold Cup? Colorado? Treasures?

The pilots can quickly lose their jobs if they don’t fly in a manner that sets up the best camera angle.

I’m certain that the raceway doesn’t set the price of a bottle of water. Yell at the concession company.

Bechtel engineers? That company is still around. I keep getting emails about how I’m not getting hired for any of the positions I apply for.

Yup. I came into a mountain corner too hot in a pickup truck. Rolled it right off the side. Thankfully, I walked away without a scratch. A few years later, I’m on a motorcycle and pull the same dumb shit. Ended up breaking both bones in my left forearm.

1998. Dublin, Ireland. I was 14. My high school band was invited to march in the St Patrick’s Day parade. The night before, we were the opening act at a concert in St Patrick’s Cathedral. The headliner? The Russian White Army Band. Sadly, there were no dancing Spetsnaz troops.

I bet that if you look up the tax code for the rebate on electric cars you’ll find that it falls under Rule 34.

Is it just me, or did they raid a Mazda parts bin?

A few years back, Houston’s football team moved to Tennessee. When it received a new franchise there was a voting contest to pick the mascot of the new franchise. Houston ended up with the Texans. The worst team name, ever. Especially considering that Dallas already have a team named the Texans. They moved to Kansas…