To be fair, in 90210 he still looked old enough to play Archie’s dad.

Well, he did make the attractive Johnny Depp disappear, so maybe.....?

I wish Johnny Depp would get himself involved in the disappearance of that terrible facial hair.

The point in my life where I feel so old I have absolutely no idea who this is someone change my bedpan please.

I love HGTV something fierce, but I cannot stand Nicole Curtis. I’m sure she is lovely, but I think the Midwestern accent just sends me over the edge.

She needs to get some new goddamn glasses. If she grew a second head they would be big enough so that each head could have one of the lenses to itself.

I love hgtv so much. Like, it is the only channel I watch on tv.

Kim says Kanye just has a “problem controlling his impulses.”

I am confused. Why would I force a person to play basketball with me if he/she was dressed like a basketball player? Does that happen? Forced basketballery?

Are we not going to talk about that girl’s twitter handle??

Philadelphia police just burned Kanye hard

Serious question but where the hell are his parents? This 18 year old is setting up his fake medical practice and no one is there is stop him or question him?

I wish i could have a job where I could have a hissy fit, bail on an agreed upon commitment and still have an army of fans ready to fall on their swords at my word.

I went with Advril. Because of the headache associations.

I don’t know if this was covered elsewhere today or not but it made my day:

His synchronized swimming bit still makes me laugh so hard I pee.

I always buy my children a little box of chocolates! While the holiday has turned into a romantic love thing, its origins are much broader love-in-general. School children exchange valentines, for goodness’ sake. They aren’t all in love with each other.

His ego’s writing checks his body can’t cash.

Crustacean porn.

What the fuck did I just read?