I’m a poor student, and I would pay not a small amount of money to watch Michelle Obama debate Donald Trump. Who’s in on this?

No, the Pats just decided to play nice.

If I was Coughlin I would get exceptionally drunk before kickoff, and fire up Twitter and just enjoy myself.

“Do I have to do fucking EVERYTHING here?”

Ashley! Please get me out of The Concourse and Deadspin greys

A spirit level costs what????

Now, hopefully the Sharks do something hugely similar in the rugby league final today!

It’s a bit hard if it’s raining the entire barnyard.

I just refer to my house where I live either by the suburb or the street.

My girlfriend is brown, and I’m so white I’m almost blue. I use more sterotypical brown person slang and am more open to making racial jokes than I really should be. She insists on calling me a white M&M. I do pick my moments carefully, and she hates my puns way more than my making racist jokes, because she knows at…

Can someone please explain why you need a national anthem before anything other than the Super Bowl?

Oh and what exactly is a “Case Keenum”? Sounds like something you’d find at LAX.

I think the Rams - THE FUCKING RAMS - proved you don’t even need a TD to beat the Seahawks right now. I watched the game with my dad, who has no idea about American Football at all, other than the fact that it exists, and I shit-talked the Rams for the first half. He started asking who was who in the second half, the…

Not if you’re crazy enough to select a Browns player in the first place.

I decided to fuck someone a few weeks after my wedding. Best decision ever.

Script is on the way, boss!

Argh can you guys stop jumping around? Stay on The Concourse or Deadspin. It’s annoying since Gawker got murdered.

I met my girlfriend because we both laughed at the Warriors choking.

Poor baby, you have to scroll a little bit more.

Fuck up!