My perception too, you came off as condescending.

Like most fields (including engineering) there are problems where a mediocre practitioner can do fine, and there are problems that require talent or even brilliance.

Not necessarily. There are degrees of coercion. "Have sex with me or I will set your house on fire tonight" is rape. "Have sex with me or this relationship is over" is not. "Have sex with me or I might get violent" is rape. "Have sex with me or you're fired" is not.

Not necessarily. There are degrees of coercion. "Have sex with me or I will set your house on fire tonight" is rape. "Have sex with me or this relationship is over" is not. "Have sex with me or I might get violent" is rape. "Have sex with me or you're fired" is not.

Nah, you should really re-read the thread, particularly where I am asked why it is "so hard" to find out someone is not interested in me.

Actually while you should definitely have female friends for a lot of reasons, having too many close ones can sabotage you when it comes to dating.

Oh lordy. As I've said multiple times on this thread, I DON'T get THAT upset over it. I was simply attacking the baseless position that people shouldn't take rejection perosonally AT ALL. That there should be ZERO emotional reaction. Considering that I have explained this point again and again and people…

So we should segregate ourselves into a looks-based hierarchy?

We are not talking about a rational, analytical reaction. Rejection hurts. Its an affective, emotional reaction. I am not going to apologize for feeling bad that I got shot down by someone. And I find it impossible to believe the people here criticizing me have reacted to situations where they were rejected with…

I would be on cloud 9 if I could date a woman into languages and old dead European culture. C'est la vie.

Wait, breaking up as in a relationship? If you are in a relationship, then yes, your partner deserves more than one sentence.

Someone who will actually not show up for a date is, frankly, a bad person and you should be at least on an intellectual level happy you found this out now rather than later. I just don't understand how someone could do that to another human being.

Of course there are many reasons to reject someone that have nothing to do with how they perceive your physical and/or mental attractiveness; however, lack of the latter two things are the most common reasons not to go on a first date with someone. Regardless, logic takes a backseat to affect in romantic areas with…

It sounds like we're on the same page then; I'm not saying it causes deep emotional scars, just that yes, it sucks for a day or two, then you get over it. But I just don't get the people who say you shouldn't take it personally at all. That's just alien to me.

No, it's not THAT much of an ego bruise, but yes, rejection hurts. Unless you're a sociopath. Have you ever asked someone out and been rejected? If not, picture it in your mind; you spend the evening working up the courage to ask a guy for his number, and he smiles at you and says "sorry, not interested." Do you…

Thank you for the condescension!

I would much rather hear that you have a boyfriend than you fnd me unappealing. Its not a question of "ownership".

Fair enough. I guess we might be thinking of different gradations of "casual," I am picturing a complete mid-date change which might be confusing, but if you just mean no flirting then that is reasonable.

Other people, particularly men, do not pick up on things as clearly as you seem to hope they did. Maybe they thought you were shy, or grew nervous. Why exactly do you want to preclude them for charcterizing it as a "great date"? However they characterize it you can stillmturn down a second.

Ehhhh....I have had a fair number of female friends and while some of them offer great romantic advice, most of them offer terrible advice. Based on what some of them have told me about the advice given them by other male friends, men usually don't give good advice to women either.