Same reason they hired Corey Lewandowski...ratings.

Imma guess they were stealing Mema's Social Security checks.

Of all the places for me to leave it.

I'm 36 years old and Little Debbie bars remain an integral part of my balanced meals.

Ok. That was meant to read *crunch bar*.

This ranking system is inherently flawed. BEHOLD THE GLORY THAT IS THE PEANUT BUTTER BRUNCH BAR!!!

Who do I have to shtup to get into this kind of study?

At least we can finally answer the question Bikini Kill asked so many years ago..."Thurston hearts the who?"

TWINSIES!

Here. Here in my head.

An indictment can only be made against a "John Doe" once the rape kit has been tested. And I think that is used in cases where the DNA hasn't been identified. Once a match is made in the DNA database, then charges can be brought against the perpetrator - regardless of how long ago the rape was committed. That's…

Let us not forget about the statute of limitations. By the time some of these kits are tested, charges can't even be brought against the rapists. How in this day and age is this allowed?! Oh yeah, because vaginas.
BEAM ME UP, XENU. I HAVE SEEN ENOUGH.