True poetry, my friend.

One my favorite Creed quotes. I live 5 minutes from Cornell’s campus, so I use it a lot. No one ever gets it, and I look like a damn fool.

LOL at Chandler Parsons and “best of us”.

Classic.

I like puns!

Let’s remember some guise.

Perfect.

I love the Roy Hibbert character! Imagine if he was a real person!

I get the Texas Tech part, by why Duke?

Indeed. I just got the Moto G7, my first Motorola, and that’s the default way battery percentage is displayed on the lock screen and home screen. I didn’t think I would like it but it’s grown on me after a few days. It really is easy to understand with a quick glance.

Came here. Was not.

Boris Diaw.

Are you saying that Zion, who has a better FG% than FT%, was not trying to score on his drives?

I’m of the opinion that Zion’s game will translate better in the NBA than college. I’m not saying he’ll score more, rebound more, etc.—it’s all relative to the competition. But, spacing is so piss poor in college basketball, and even more so this year with Duke’s lack of shooting. Still, Zion is so damn fast at…

FOR THE LOVE OF THE GAME!!!

Haha Chandler Parsons.

A similar thing happened when I was wading through a dreadful Magic - Kings game in the mid-2000's wherein Steve Francis and Mike Bibby had a duel for who could brick the most foot-on-the-line two-pointers. Yes, the post-Jordan, pre-LeBron era was as sad as you remember.

Oh man. My first car was a ‘91 240SX hatchback, and boy did I drool over all those sweet body kit possibilities.

Sun dog.

This is why I come to Deadspin. Thank you, comrade.