Star for the ‘insincere cheeto.’

Every Republican I know thinks defunding Planned Parenthood is not a good move, so I guess it varies with a more liberal state (Maryland). Many Maryland Republicans I know just won’t vote if it’s Ted Cruz or Donald Trump, because they think they will ruin the Republican party. I was just going with the national stats…

Of course he’d suppress the pancakes. Jeb is in the pocket of Big Waffle.

Miley’s got resting Somebody-Please-Still-Give-A-Fuck-About-This-Shtick face.

Rachel: Now this is just the first chapter, and I want your absolute honest opinion, okay? Oh, oh, and on page two he’s not ‘reaching for her heaving beasts’.
Monica: What’s a ‘niffle’?
Joey: You can usually find them on the ‘heaving beasts’.
Rachel: All right, all right, all right. So I’m not a great typist
Ross: Wait!…

Ugh, this reminds me of the recent SVU where Whoopi Goldberg plays a social worker who’s been busted for egregious, wholesale forging of records in her department that led to a child’s death. When questioned on the stand, she just finally fucking loses it and says “GOD HIMSELF COULD NOT DO THIS JOB.”

“Police officers do not get paid to get stabbed or shot,” Forcillo argued. “They are paid to go home in one piece.”

That’s amazing. And I am fully confident that you ARE the best at what you do.

Let me be the first to affirm that being the only one in no way diminishes your status as The Best at whatever it is you do; one could argue that it only adds to your distinguishment. That’s the beauty in it, see?

Danny Devito gets it. He's one of the few celebrities not putting his foot in his mouth.

Exactly!

On second thought, let’s not go to Rhode Island. ’Tis a silly place.

She clearly and directly said no many times. At no point did she say yes or initiate sexual contact, thereby demonstrating she’d changed her mind and was consenting. The problem with saying this isn’t rape is it implicitly means that no number of no’s is ever enough to render it non-consensual if your natural reaction…

That is so wonderful!

Carrie Fisher and Anna Kendrick aren’t my friends and I feel like that means I’m not living my life right.