Either this twitter post was not from NdGT, or he doesn't know anything about what happened.

They thought they were kidnapping Stuart Appleby.

After further review, he is not a catch.

At least you won't have to deal with sports highlight anchors calling them the San JosA's.

Pretty bad fuckup, huh?

After deciding on Del Rio as his coach, Mark Davis set his sights on the super bowl. His thoughts returned to football after a few minutes of admiring his new haircut.

All he said was, "How far can you punt a football?"

"YOU ALL CAN CALL ME MOZILLA FROM NOW ON BECAUSE I JUST HAD TO FIRE FOX."

Denver needs to win a superbowl before Elway starts this sort of self aggrandizing talk. He's clearly putting the cart before himself.

Well, my excuse to my wife when she caught me nose deep in my buddy's ass was that my nose was numb, so who am I to judge? Coincidentally, I also live in Detroit and am a Lions fan.

I don't think getting rid of Blatt would be the final solution to the Cavs' problem.

Since most of the season ticket holders are now silicon valley neo-wealth, I'd imagine most of them weren't born before Montana was drafted and likely don't know who he is.

Of course the Niners are stupid, Drew. It takes a special kind of stupid to let seven eat you.

We will see. 3NFCC appearances and 1 SB loss in 4 years is pretty damn green, not sure grass is gonna get greener-

You simply flip the switch from "play" to "demo" and everything works out.

<Michigan AD on phone call>
Michigan AD: "Yea, I'm married, does it matter? You'd do that for me? Really? I'd like that."
<Wife enters, agitated>
Wife: "Who are you talking to?"
Michigan AD: "It's Jim, from San Fran."
Wife: "Jim from San Fran at 3 in the morning <grabs phone>...who is this?"
Michigan AD: "It's Jim, from San…

I eagerly await reports of the first drunk 3-AM-on-a-Saturday text exchanges between the two following the break-up.

SF: I miss u bae
Harbaugh: Michigan treats me better than u
SF: MICHAGUN WONT DO THE THING YOU LIKE
Harbaugh: Please don't say it
SF: BUTTHOLE

The problem isn't that he stepped on him, it's that he didn't move for a good ten seconds after and then put another foot on him