Actually *adjusts spectacles* if I’m not mistaken, San Antonio doesn’t have a newspaper, rather a tree in the centre of town where people post missing cat signs and ads for Mario Elie’s cleaning service.

did I really pause an episode of Beachcombers for this?

“Again?”

Bollocks, I’ll fuck Rupert Murdoch if I want to.

As the old adage goes, if a tree falls in the forest, will Bartolo Colon mistake it for a Snickers bar.

For all their inhumane and despicable actions, the NFL’s tribute to Mark Kelso was a nice touch.

They were a collection of nice guys from various backgrounds emblematic of our wonderful city and thus, were incredibly easy to get behind. The fact of the matter is, the team cannot play D. Too much help defending leaving perimeter guys open, and the screen and roll destroyed them all year, never more apparent than…

+1

What the Santa Clara Youth Soccer League fails to realize is that these parking lots are more than a place to park your car, they’re a place where families and friends gather to celebrate what Sundays are all about, alcoholism, violence, and archaic standards for the treatment of women.

I have so many feelings about this match, but Chamakh cheekily chipping the keeper at the death is one of the most hilarious things I've seen in football.

You don’t need a discerning eye to recognize the work of Peter Paul Reubens.

+1

that's hilarious

If Michele is looking for an extra L, I'm sure the Knicks would be willing to part with one of theirs.

Probably won’t sleep tonight knowing that one of the last things these people saw was Mrs. Krzyzewski’s jacket.

Several Duke fans just realized that a noose isn't the only way to hang somebody from a tree.

If I could go back in time, I’d have lunch with Adolf Hitler in Vienna, 1912, before he had fully embraced antisemitism. We’d talk about what his plans were for the money from his father’s estate and have a passionate discussion on the merits of zonal marking on set pieces. Hitler would order the schnitzel, and I, the…

hey so is it cool if I just send you some pics of me in the shower, you know, putting soap on my butt and dick and stuff ?

hah

"Okay, pervert, look at the camera and do not smile.... Christ on a motherfucking bike... who put a photo of a black guy's naked butt on the ceiling again?"