Please post this to jezebel, just for the awesome reactions.

To be fair, Ohioans bellies are usually preventing from going all the way down.

Nothing excites me more than watching JJ Watt do jack shit.

Does it really require 20 reporters trying to get a “yes” quote? Like, I really dont get the point in trying to land this lukewarm scoop.

So you’re insinuating a Pakistani born immigrant is acting in a racist fashion against CK?

I mean he’s on the Brown’s. How much worse could his life get?

Why they gotta be white?

Probably so. But its not my job to be.

Cool and all, but is there anyone unfunnier than Samantha Bee? If I know her punch lines before she get’s to them, somethings wrong.

No. It means the law is to be changed.

“People in Sedona sit on rocks at night hoping aliens will take them away.”

Yeah not so much. The lettuce/tomato portion, youre correct.

Or you could’ve just wrote “Twitter and the people who engage in it are stupid and pointless” and saved yourself some time.

Eh. Barkin up the wrong tree on this one Mike.

Actually they can. And did.

Should I have commented favorably on the low-scoring nature of the game? Oh wait. Its a bad thing right?

You’re forgettig its major selling point. Its not Cleveland.

Anything to entertain them during another 0-0 tie.

Mother nature man!!!

Well you didnt look hard then. Theres a aport shop in the airport selling their gear, as well as in almoat every casino I went to.