Are you fucking serious? Please refer to the internet for an endless stream of knob polishing articles about the sixers.

Demerit Park indeed.

When I played little league, we had a girl on our team who was absolutely better than all of the boys in the entire league. I remember the only thing I was pissed about was that she didn’t have to wear a cup.

I am not suggesting we replace democracy with a system of government that makes decisions based on physical combat but I’m also not not suggesting that at this point in our history.

Rod Salka is the exact kind of name a tomato can like him should have.

You thought you could escape. You thought you could be spared. YOU WERE WRONG.

I don’t even have to look it up. I 100% believe you without any hesitation. Bcuz internet.

Porn will be made no matter what. We got fucking fighter jet porn. FIGHTER. JET. PORN.

Its really strange that the two references people are grabbing onto are middle age soccer mom and peak hotness Rihanna.

Shouldn’t this be called “Tumblr Reacts”?

Simply put it is (or at least was) a popular hairstyle within that demographic.

Every human who has ever worked customer service of any kind has had some white woman who looks remarkably like this ask to talk to their manager.

I mean, I get that, but what about this specific haircut screams that? Is this something that white women with short hair are more likely to do?

I don’t understand the “can I talk to your manager” thing.

Don’t forget how he teabagged Cena, wagging his tongue out as he did so, on the pin.

Please run for President. Your country needs you.

The part of your comment I have the most trouble believing is that anyone was watching the Padres game.

Yesterday we saw a home run in an elevator shaft drop in the infield and cost the Padres a game partly because after high school in the US pitchers somehow stop being one of the best athletes on the field and need to be hit for and aren’t allowed to catch fly balls. I realize this is a gross over-simplification but…

Snl’s funny when they do black stuff. They should have more black stuff.