I read the headline as “Peter North is better...” which would make Destiny more Leisure Suit Larry than FPS.

There’s only one Mr. Baseball and his name is Bob Ueker

A: Scarlet Nights

Woah there. Greatest hitter of all time? Bullshit. Barry never once hit above .400

I am mortified.

Well la-dee-da! Mr fancypants over here got his own umbrella and raincoat.

(pictured) or whatever

Humm lived the life of Riley

Clearly, you don’t follow the packers. Ted Thompson would rather chop off a finger with a rusty garden shears than sign a free agent. He allows for 1 FA every 5 years, after which, he dons his hair shirt and castigates himself with a thorny lash and cilice for a month until properly chastened.

For real

Tulane Green Wave

Can we safely say this is the cruellest zoom shot of all time? I think so.

Chicksplaining is a thing now? Cool.

Being a man of a certain age, I read that FOHnetically.

Grok is a perfectly cromulent word in this context.

I am 39 years old and still have NO FUCKING CLUE how offsides works. It seems like a rule that’s there just to keep scoring down. Wouldn’t soccer be WAY more entertaining if there were no offsides rule?

You’re a wordy motherfucker, Bruce

And yet, things like this massacre confirm there is no such thing as a just, compassionate god.

LeBron notches incessantly. It’s like it’s written into his contract to whine

No one should have to look at feet, much less have to touch them. No ammount of money is enough to compensate these poor bastards. I can’t in good conscience ask anyone to do that. Gross!