Edited to link to urbandictionary :)

There is just no way he’s not a total starfish.

She just won so many points with that completely arbitrary metaphor.

serious question: can you be a 23-year-old-woman with a dadbod. asking for a friend, of course.

Not unlike having two beds, one of which is to sleep on, while the other is for getting one’s freak on.

I assumed it meant that I would welcome mortality in the case of a Mumford insemination—in which case, dark/still distracting.

St. Lola in the Fields, “Don’t Say”

This is definitely one of those things that, while my rational side knows it is bullshit, will totally stick in my mind and inform my decisions once I, myself, am a neurotic parent.

oh my god I can't stop cube-giggling

Acidic?

Your username is everything.

dat bouffant

I think a lot of us had the same idea. I am okay with this.

Niels Henrik Abel. Stone-cold fox and pioneering algebraist.

in the "problematic but pretty" bucket we also have one Joseph Stalin

To be fair, at least in SoCal taco shops, rolled taco is the correct term. If anything, their choice to call it that is actually a move towards authenticity.