First, I wouldn’t trust the owner of the car at all

Can you let me know when you will be returning to sports coverage so I can go back to checking in once or twice per day? I have a lot to do today at work and all of these posts about non-sports topics are distracting because I Must Read Every Single One of Them. Whereas with the sports stuff I really only care if its…

It’s only useful if other people you text also have it enabled.

The site of Fisher and Barnes' treaty? Temecula.

Sadly, yes, a common result of port-a-potty sex.

Golf clap.

Weird that it took a meltdown of a generational talent for the Nats to finally win a fucking playoff series.

Can’t believe I blew that one. It’s fixed, now.

Yeah, the accent mark is pretty critical in that particular instance!

cool thank you for taking the time

i do subtitles when i have the time . . . IN FACT! i had time, this time! there’ll be subtitles in there in a couple minutes . . . !!!!!

Jesus, that was an incredible play and Joe Buck made it sound as exciting as eating corn flakes in a bowl of lukewarm milk.

Rick Reilly must be turning over in his grave. 

“Edmonton is the top attraction in the Pacific”

I have an incredibly hard time imagining that someone who is good enough to start for the Oranje and was born and raised in the Netherlands would instead choose the clownshow that is the USMNT.

I’m still pissed that Parmenides marked Zeno down at the half-yard line in 435 BC. Replay would have fixed that.

Well, former USMNT and Seattle Sounders goalkeeper Marcus Hahnemann seems like a possible suspect. Why, here he is retweeting Jason Rantz himself!

I remember when the greatest controversy surrounding soccer is when Dylan’s whore-ass mom brought whole oranges instead of slices.

Giri is clearly referring to the problem of time in theoretical physics.

Okeke, who theoretically has a finite number of playing years to earn an NBA salary,