God bless Waffle House. There is a reason the term ‘Waffle House story’ exists.

Personally, I found his tribute to Flight 370 incredibly touching.

Happy Saint Patrick’s Da—oh ... hmm.

Do you eat it standing up or sitting down? Eat front to back or back to front?

NO WAY MAN IT TAKES A SPECIAL PHILLY VIBE TO COAX DELICIOUSNESS FROM SUCH DISSONANT INGREDIENTS AS “MEAT” AND “CHEESE.”

This was just a proxy war in the Pampered Prep School Self-Made Inheritor pissing match between Charles & David Koch and Win Butler of the Arcade Fire.

Canoeiong, CANOEING! STFU and kiss Michaels feet! He could win the 1000 meter butterfly with a a goddamn canoe tied to his left foot!

Oh, it's the "check your privilege" argument. Cool. Because, I mean, he's not competing against other "privileged" guys from France, Germany, Italy, Australia, South Africa, Britain, Japan... Nah, he doesn't work at his craft either swimming, lifting weights, strictly dieting for years on end. He just sits around and…

This is the comment I was waiting for. +1

More like Chad ‘Not Even’ Le Clos.

He doesn’t owe us shit, and maybe, just maybe, he’s not trying to be the most popular person in the world.

Are they playing this game at Boise State?

Zachary D. Manprin: Cardinal Fan or Schiano Man?

Their Ferrari Testarossa replica is pathetic.

Fernominal! +1

“Why would there be confusion if he spoke English? Joining us in in studio to discuss is Emmitt Smith.”

I expect to be attacked for telling the truth. You can believe she is a self-made woman all you want but I wouldn’t recommend it if you want to seem like a reasonable person.

Can we agree that it’s unlikely Hillary Clinton would have been a Senator or Secretary of State if she wasn’t married to Bill?

Lol ok America hater I'll just be over here poppin bottles for Ginny 💯🇺🇸🔫🍾💯🇺🇸🔫🍾💯🇺🇸🔫🍾💯🇺🇸🔫🍾

Oh, then you’re just an idiot.