*Petah Pahkah

Who said that? I heard something, but I don’t see--oh, you’re down there!

“Let me just get in a Trump/MAGA comment on this completely unrelated topic.”

Your friend is a genius and nobody appreciates his work

Mariners are all but assured to fall out of pace. They are not a team that sustains winning at all in the last two decades.

I assume “Strawberry’s stance,” means hunched over a mirror with one finger covering a nostril?

So where’s the footage of the donuts? That’s what we all want right?

I dunno, the way Gomez stayed down suggests two guys, one cup.

Probably in the minority here, but I think it’s fair for an athlete not to want to take part in someone else’s political speech - not wearing the jersey isn’t that different than not wanting to stand for the anthem. This isn’t a private team, it’s the USWNT, for all intents and purposes an arm of the state.

It’s true. Cougars will destroy you if they get you on your back.

plus that suspension during the playoffs won’t be an issue.

I never understood hazing. “Oh, you want to be part of our team? Let us be tremendous assholes to you for a while and then you can join.” I can see, like, making the freshman carry the water or some shit, fine.

More like Pooperintendent amirite

When asked if he was worried about the threats, Harbaugh responded “Bitch, pleats!”

“I’d put a first round grade on this guy just off his potential murder targets, but those functioning, intact ACLs have me pushing him back to the second day.”

But how does he feel about bowling alleys?

Why do you guys even care about Barstool? This is some Burger King-McDonald’s playground fighting bullshit. Nobody else cares except for Deadspin staffers.

After the ejection, Devin Kurant went on Instagram to say that the no-call was bullshit and Kevin is very handsome.

It sucks all the time.