My sister is at home a lot right now, and she’s confirmed that, yes, a few minutes before I usually get home from work, my cat climbs out of wherever he’s been napping and goes to wait by the door for me. It fills me with joy every day.

aw. my cats love me so much, it’s always so obvious. they always sit next to me (or on top of me), wherever i go in the house. they follow me everywhere too and wait for me outside the bathroom. i don’t know if they know when i’m coming home, but every day as i pull up to the house after work, they’re in the window…

I don’t understand why ‘going to bed hella early’ was a category and ‘sleeping in until the afternoon on the weekends’ wasn’t one. When you’re an adult, you can stay in bed forever without anyone giving you shit about it.

*appalling

I’m convinced that a large percentage of the population has poor listening comprehension.

i literally plan my deliveries based off which apps allow me to add the tip and everything when i place my order, so i can just get my food handed to me and go back inside. i hate standing there with them while i tip and sign and try to figure out which copy of the receipt is mine.

are we still talking about birds?

I want an emotional support cock.

i. LOVE. THE IKEA CAFE SO MUCH. The food is GOOD and it’s cheap and the portion sizes are so reasonable! I seriously think they should be their own chain, separate from Ikea

I love IKEA. It’s like a themepark of scented candles and throwpillows and glasses I can actually afford, PLUS meatballs.

Love, Love Madeleine and Bobby, but the cast just isn’t for me. I can’t focus on casual friendly nattering anymore than I can listen to a DVD commentary where 5 people are all interrupting each other. We need out “MM” more now than ever.

Charles and Diana’s pairing came about for much the same reason people have disaster sex - the need for human closeness and comfort during a tough time.

I just explained the notion of tacking “Electric Boogaloo” onto any sequel to my 7 year old in hopes that she will pass on this element of culture to her peers.

Dude. You just heard a woman talk about how she was mentally preparing herself to be raped by three men. And that she was focusing on how her sister would heal after finding her dead body and this is what you come out of it with? The fuck is wrong with you? Have like, a semblance of empathy. Ever.

I don’t get why you boys feel the need to post jokes and shallow vapid pieces all day. How hard is it to do a couple of gossipy-fun posts (you know celebs, sports what the fuck ever that is silly and fun), a couple of updates on what the administration is doing, and updates on the Women’s Strike Day? Why are you all…

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

3/7/2017, 5am’ish.

There can only be one.

omg, my cat loves these types of shows, too! It’s so cute. He ignores all other tv, movies or video games, but pays attention if it’s a nature show.

I used to let Harrison watch CNN but when I got back home I usually discovered that he had punished me in my absence. And I’m not sure that I *am* a cat person exactly. This cat and I are not friends, he is definitely not another baby, and the little shit owes me hard cash (he ate a benjamin for funsies). He’s…