The dipshits fly the Confederate Naval Jack. This is the Stars and Bars:

I end up shouting at about half the delightful Google Doodles to just fucking stop moving

"Drive engagement" = "punch your screen"?

Minor was also on his way to becoming quite a Jack the Ripper (of Irish, not hoes) when he got busted.

I lived in SC for most of my long life and never heard "the War of Northern Aggression" except ironically. "War Between the State" is another story.

What you're thinking of as the Stars and Bars is not the Flag.

We South Carolinians are puzzled about why the Palmetto State would be left out of "worst."

The first word in the OED is aa.

My Algebra II teacher might have been the devil..

Oooooo. Look at Euclid and all his geometrical vocab.

Mooooooooooooooooooooch!

At least this one pushes those unattractive Ne-Hi bros aside.

Give yourself a rating?! Assholes.

More delicious skin on the wings.

My mom grew up on a farm. She remembers fighting with her brother over who'd get the chicken brain.

The peafowl at Flannery O'Connor's house in Milledgeville, GA, used to fly over and swim in the pool at the motel across the road.

They realized they had meant to go to Pittsburgh.
Understandable mistake.

How much meat is there on a chicken rib?

I went to a Methodist wedding in Birmingham once. Instead of wafers, the bread served with communion was loaves of whole grain from the local artisan bakery. That was some good Jesus.

You also get to peel those little paper holders off them and then ball them up and throw them at cats.