This damn statue can get in line if he wants his soul set free. Lions fans have had our souls cursed for 50+ years.

On a related note: I’ve lost my DFS pool three weeks running. I need help.

Dunno, this might actually be my least favorite flavor of sports assholedom. I’ll take a double scoop of Sheed.

This kind of sensationalist nonsense isn’t why I come to Deadspin.

Yeah but then there’s the 10 minutes of crying afterward

Pup, Phil and Sugar Cane are all partners in the same firm as the Texas law hawk.

Here’s a lame dad antic I look forward to. Going out to a family dinner, looking at the check, and saying to myself, “hmmmm lets take a look at the damage.”

This guy’s not even a real doctor!

Unfortunately there’s a huge conflict of interest here.

He was just showing him what Captain Insano does to the bad guy.

I get what you’re saying. But i’d rather have that than bland ass motherfuckers like say a Joe Buck or other boring playcaller.
At least it’s funny because it’s ridiculous.

Not directly related, but I always found interesting how Colonel Sanders (or “Uncle Kentucky” as he’s known in Japan) is viewed in Japan.

My favorite anecdote is how celebrating Hanshin Tigers Baseball fans threw a local Colonel Sanders prop into a river after winning the Japan Series title in 1985... prompting a…

RUSSIAN INFORMATION PORPOISES ARE A CLOSELY HELD STATE SECRET!

Yes the Rubin Kazan is making the headlines all over the world. I make the predictions that the club will become champions league champion in the next few years. We have the talents to make a push for league winner and european glory next to the greats of europe such as Bayern Munchen and Barcelona. For your…

"It's coming to you!' -Jason Kidds' car to the telephone pole.