Oh my god, you can't just ask people why they're white!

All day long:

And that's why they invented LED tea lights!

If Google let us create and customize our own Gmail tabs, the feature would be better.

Yay, random Hitchhiker references!

I want this for adults. Except instead of candy, you get tiny bottles of vodka and other assorted 'encouragements'.

I would take this assignment. I want to see how someone gives birth with their head completely up their own ass.

YES IT IS.

WHAT ABOUT THE COMPETITIVE EATERS AND VIDEO GAMERS?

This makes me think of this fascinating project. Fitness and beauty and bodies are so diverse and incredible!

this is the song of the summer:

John Stamos, I was never really a big fan, but if you're into "The Rainbow Connection" as much as I am, then you're okay in my book.

So, Amanda Bynes has finally had her stopped clock moment.

I don't wanna gender-police here, but um...isn't that a Penis Woman and Vagina Man? (Which, personally, I think is even radder than the other way around.)

Or my co-workers, jesus christ.

I've always wanted a reason to wear a tutu to work. Knee length = work appropriate, right?

I fixed the poster.

Like, Parcheesi and some shit? I don't know. Seriously, I do not understand people who are uptight about discussing sex. I WANT TO TALK ABOUT FUCKING, DAMMIT.

I... I don't understand. My brain is literally a diagram of a penis going into a vagina.

Maybe that's why I don't have friends!