IRL

A lifelong lesson: before you bronze, think.

Dior Chauve-souris

I considered that... there are a few racially indistinct people back in that corner of the picture (several East Asian people, perhaps?) who might have had interesting thoughts spinning through their brains as they smiled for the photo.

Two (mostly rhetorical) questions:

Oh, god, no, she's going to suck and not take the training seriously. I feel like this is one of the few shows where at least the final two are usually the ones who apply themselves and have some ability. That's why you can almost bet money on any athlete being a finalist.

Right? I thought Bill Nye was going to be the Jerry Springer-style comic relief for the season until I saw the footnote about Bill Engvall.

Wow, I think that's the most People I Recognize (tm) in a DWTS cast in a long time.

I can only hope they just have really bad lighting in their bathrooms.

NON-obvious ways? I would think the presence of large quantities of toys in an adult setting would be one of those red flags...

I feel like someone should find this girl and... help her, somehow. She needs a bronzer intervention.

This guy?

I googled "facebook" and "duck face" aaaaand this is what I got. Real life: always weirder than made-up shit.

Note to Mr. Barbie Guy: "Eeewww!" is not actually an expression of jealousy.

It's like she took every possible YouTube makeup tutorial from 2005 and tried to do them all at once. Badly.

My cat goes apeshit on catnip. We had to take it away from him, and it still took him almost an hour to stop flinching at nothing.