Couldn't find a real sonic screwdriver dildo (an Etsy maker is no longer selling them), but I did find this:

I agree with KapalJJ. Sounds like the guy doesn't want to hurt you, but doesn't feel romantic towards you. None of those things he mentioned actually prohibits a relationship.

Sherlock Holmes. Partially because he's so smart, but mainly because it would super-irritate him to be pocket-sized.

We all have such different plumbing, it's hard to imagine one toy can hit everything all at once for most people.

The use of the Courier font is a dead give away that engineers were involved.

I think I've seen that one! They sell it at those tupperware parties for sex toys, I think. I'd be hard pressed to know whether that would go in the Scariest or Twee-est blog list.

Oh, god, can you imagine the phone call to a grandkid, trying to figure this thing out?

Why are you taking out the batteries, Dave? I can't let you do that...

See, for me, scary would be something that looks too complicated. Something like this:

Ick. Yipe and ICK.

I'm kind of jealous... I could be just taking off my hair before bed, and then putting back on before leaving the house. So much easier than washing, brushing, maintaining the real thing.

I don't know who Courtney Stodden is, but is that real hair? Like, hair that's not a wig or about to fall out from peroxide? 'Cause it looks... strange.

Who is the super-cool parent who styled they're kid's hair like this for a visit to the White House to meet the President?

If you're chewing, it's not hard (disgusting, gross, but not hard to do), but mainly I'd already used stained, so I needed another verb.

I'm shocked SHOCKED that none of my elected representatives responded to even one of the angry, tear-stained emails (?) I sent them. They're a big bunch of tobacco-swilling bullies and I hate them.

Will there be white doves? I want there to be white doves.

why not "The Clever Cock"? We'll never know